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Before You Buy Your First Sex Toy

When you buy your first sex toy, it’s always a bit of a gamble. There’s no way to tell what you’ll like unless you try it, and while some sex shops offer satisfaction guarantees, none currently offer a trial room (legend has it that there were some in the 80s).

That does not preclude you from increasing the odds that your first sex toy will be one you like. My best suggestion is to find something that is inexpensive and versatile; something that will allow you to experiment with different things and that will not turn you off sex toys completely if you do not like them and feel like you wasted $100 on something that did not work.

Before you make your purchase, consider the following aspects.

Do some research before choosing a sex toy

Even if you are not sure what you want, having a general idea of the type of stimulation you enjoy will help you narrow down your options more quickly and effectively. Masturbation is the most effective way to find out this information.

If you are uncomfortable with masturbation, no amount of sex toys will make things better.
Start on your own, without the use of sex toys.

If you like to read, get a decent book on sex toys (if not, there are many online primers on sex toys).

Finally, to avoid getting ripped off, make sure you shop at a reputable and ethical sex shop.

Do you have a special request for your first sex toy?

Most people choose sex toys based on their practicality. Sex toys are not designed for certain types of people, but for certain types of sex play.

You are probably looking for a sex toy for anal play, a device that can be worn on the penis, clitoris, or nipples, something that can increase or decrease sensation.

There are no “best” answers to these questions, and the process of discovering a sex toy you like can be just as entertaining as using the item you end up purchasing.

Would you rather use it alone, together, or both?

I mentioned earlier that sex toys are not meant for specific people, but that some are more suitable for singles’ or couples’ play.

When buying a sex toy that is suitable for two people, it is good that each partner shares their preferences and then choose something that would fit in between both partners’ needs.

On the other hand, if you are only aiming to pleasure yourself, there are fewer requirements to meet.

While some couples keep things simple and opt for two toys to use together, others prefer the middle ground and opt for one item that is good enough for both of them.

What kind of budget do you have in mind?

There is not always a direct correlation between quality and pleasure.

An affordable sex toy can provide just as much pleasure as a high-end toy, but it most likely will not last as long. Investing in high-end sex toys is a good idea once you figure out what you like because they are less wasteful and often have more attractive designs.

First and foremost, if you do not have a lot of money to spend, I recommend sticking with budget toys until you figure out exactly what you want to do with your sex toy, how would you like it to perform.

There’s nothing more frustrating than spending $130 on a sex toy that ends up gathering dust under your bed for months.

How will you respond to your sex toy?

Another factor to consider before buying your first sex toy is whether or not you will have a negative physical reaction to the device.

While more and more manufacturers are taking sex toy safety into consideration, the majority of sex toys are still made of unknown materials that can cause severe allergic reactions in some people.

You should always inquire about the safety of the material of sex toys if you are prone to infections or allergic reactions, or if your immune system is compromised in any way. If the sex shop is unable to provide an explanation, avoid buying from them.

Amie Dawson, Ph.D.

Amie is your go-to gal for all things related to sex and sexual well-being.

A certified sex educator and award-winning sex toy reviewer, Amie has spent her career empowering individuals and couples to embrace their sexuality.

With a Ph.D. in Human Sexuality and an ever-growing collection of over 200 vibrators, she's got the knowledge and experience to guide you on your pleasure-seeking journey.

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