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What is Tantric Sex?

Sex is exciting, but it is not anything new. There have probably been people who have thought, talked, and eventually written about what sex means and how we can make it more meaningful for as long as humans have been having sex (which, for all we know, means from the beginning of humankind).

Tantric sex and teachings about tantric sexuality are among the earliest examples of a spiritual ideology of sexuality that is still practiced today.

What exactly is tantra?

Tantra, according to one translation, means “instruments for expansion.” Tantra, like yoga, is almost 1500 years old and originated in India.

It is a set of teachings and practices designed to help us feel more and become more aware of our own energy and that of others.

Definition of Tantric Sex

Tantra’s method of achieving these goals is to explore sexual energy.

Tantric sex aims to give us a greater sense of depth and spaciousness in our sexuality. The idea is to enrich the whole sexual experience. The climax is not the ultimate goal of tantric sex.

Is tantra considered a religion?

Ancient Tantric teachings do mention concepts such as “universal energy” and “higher power,” but the teachings aren’t always about adhering to a set of beliefs or laws.

If you’re intrigued by the idea that sexual expression can help you connect with a higher power, Tantra has much to offer.

Tantra can offer you many wonderful ways to strengthen or deepen your sexual relationship with your partner without having to follow certain beliefs.

For whom is tantric sex beneficial?

Many of the teachings deal with sexual energy and the feeling of desire.

Unlike Western techniques for improving sex life, the Tantric teachings do not emphasize external evaluations of how our bodies look, what kind of car we drive, or how we style our hair. The Tantric sexual teachings are accessible to anyone who wants to discover a new path to sexual bliss.

Integrating the ideas of Tantra into one’s sex life is something that anyone can achieve, regardless of age, gender, sexual orientation, or how one’s body looks, feels, or moves.

What exactly are chakras?

Tantra recognizes a variety of energy systems that exist within us.

Chakras are energy centers in the body located between the pelvis and the crown of the head. You may have heard of them before, especially if you have attended yoga classes.

The theory underlying this school of thought is that the smooth flow of energy in our bodies can get stuck somewhere in the system, preventing it from moving freely or depleting it for various reasons. The tantric practice aims to allow energy to flow freely and organically through us.

What does tantric sex feel like?

Tantra differs in many ways from Western notions of sex. The Western conception of sex is like a story with a definite beginning (sexual arousal), middle (penetration), and end (sexual satisfaction) in the form of orgasm.

According to modern society, that’s how it should be, and if you don’t understand what’s going on, something is wrong. Sex without penetration is often considered “not right” or “just” foreplay.

Tantric sex is about the experience, not the orgasm. There’s no specific beginning, middle, or end to this practice. Most tantric sex practices involve slowing down and trying not to think about our outer body, climax, or anything else that’s not part of our current experience.

Having that the goal isn’t to climax at the end of the session, it’s a heightened awareness that leads to a better understanding of ourselves, which in turn leads to enlightenment. There’s no pressure to “get over the top”.

Tantric sex does not necessarily mean sex with a partner. It can be in the form of prolonged masturbation, with or without reaching an orgasm. The goal is to enjoy exceptional pleasure for a long time by stimulating your erogenous zones.

For women, external stimulators, such as magic wand vibrators, mini bullet sex toys, and clitoris suckers are great options, especially if used on their lowest intensity settings. These devices are great for massage on the external vulva, clitoris, or nipples.

By edging, many men can achieve tantric levels of sexual restraint for an explosive climax. Edging is the act of bringing yourself to the verge of orgasm but halting just before the ejaculation.

It’s quite intense when you do it a few times before you get that delayed orgasm; it’s much more intense when you increase the pleasure element to lead you to that delayed orgasm.

Men often choose automatic masturbators to achieve tantric pleasure by sending highly resonating sensations throughout their genitals.

Using a phone-controlled vibrator (while relaxing) in the pubic and testicular areas during solo practice can be very pleasurable and seductive. It’s also important for a man’s sexual health and stamina to massage the prostate daily.

Prostate massagers are easily accessible, available in vibrating and non-vibrating forms. With some practice, the procedure can be done using one’s fingers, it will just take some time and patience to get used to performing it.

Of course, teasing oneself and not necessarily reaching climax isn’t to say that orgasm is absent from Tantra; it’s just not the ultimate goal of being intimate with someone. Spiritual practice and positive sexual feelings are interconnected, with one leading to and enhancing the other.

Different people will have different ideas of what tantric sex “looks like”. Tantra is taught by a variety of teachers around the world, each with their own interpretation, inspired by the cultures they grew up with.

Compared to the frenetic, orgasm-focused North American style, a key feature of tantric sex is the importance of breathing, slowing down sexual behavior, and experiencing maximum pleasure during the entire session.

Amie Dawson, Ph.D.

Amie is your go-to gal for all things related to sex and sexual well-being.

A certified sex educator and award-winning sex toy reviewer, Amie has spent her career empowering individuals and couples to embrace their sexuality.

With a Ph.D. in Human Sexuality and an ever-growing collection of over 200 vibrators, she's got the knowledge and experience to guide you on your pleasure-seeking journey.

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